This will be interesting

It’s Friday!

But in addition to that, today is the day.  Today we invite our little one’s little sister into our home.  She is being transferred from another foster home to ours.  So by this evening our home will be a little more crowded, a little more cozy, a little more…more.

If that wasn’t enough, we will begin house shopping tomorrow.  We are going to buy a home, and we don’t have a Realtor yet (that will come soon), but tomorrow we are going to go see some of the houses we are interested in from the outside and shop neighborhoods.  We may also be meeting with a friend and fellow foster parent for a play date.  Apparently there is a park near her where water shoots out from the ground.

Kids love that stuff.

So do foster dads.

Either way, we will have two small children in tow while we shop.. Then on Sunday we will partake in church services, followed by swim lessons with a friend from church. I don’t expect much rest until Sunday evening.

Maybe.

Did I mention water shooting out from the ground?

 

Time is a factor

So this week has been tiring.

We are getting ready to receive our little one’s little sister.  So this week has been one of frantic running around, meeting with one person or another, arranging for the new little one, putting together a high chair, new stroller, making sure we have diapers, food, etc.

We know it is all worth it, but we are tired.

And of course when it rains….

The wife has come down with another virus, probably transmitted to her from our little one who got it from day care.

Fun!

Verse for the day:

Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Isiah 40:28-32

Fostering the Sultan of Swat

I was an avid baseball fan as a kid.  I remember when I was about 10 or 11 years old, and my mom would leave my brothers and I in the public library while she ran errands.  I remember those times as formative years, where I would learn much of what I knew about the great baseball players in history.  I would immediately go to the section where I knew the baseball history books were.

That is where I learned about Babe Ruth.

Babe Ruth was a foster kid.  He was placed in foster care at age 7.  While in foster care, he learned to play baseball, and of course we know what happened next.  He grew up to be a legend, one of the greatest baseball players ever, hitting over 700 home runs and going down as the greatest Yankee.  Many will remember that Yankee stadium was called the house that Ruth built.

What is interesting is that in most books that tell his story, very little is told about those years.  What most books say was simply that he was a rough kid, and lived in a reformatory.  But I do wonder what allowed George Herman Ruth to survive those times, and what allowed him to succeed in life where others did not.  It seems to me that the Babe was able to succeed because of baseball.  I mean, he was able to find something he was good at, that lifted him out of his situation.  I suspect that those around him in his care recognized his potential, and encouraged it.  How different would his life had been if he had not had that encouragement, or if he had been placed in a reformatory where baseball was not played.

I guess my point is how fragile we really are as humans.  No matter how much talent we have buried deep inside of us, we just cannot do it alone.  We can all look back into our childhood and remember that one person, one event, one season in our lives where our abilities were brought out of us.  How different would our lives be if that didn’t happen, of if for some reason, we failed to take the opportunity when it was presented.

I see foster parents today as fulfilling that role.  We are the spark that can either ignite a child, or extinguish them.  It is a big responsibility that God has placed on us.  Don’t get me wrong.  A Babe Ruth may only come around once in a lifetime.  But maybe we have the next president, or singer, policemen or fireman in our home.  Whatever this child may become, it is us that can make the difference in their lives.

I pray that God gives us the time, strength, and wisdom to pour out His love and His plan for the life of this little child.

I also pray for those souls who don’t have someone in their lives to fulfill this role.  May His love and guidance bring them out of their present situation.

Play ball!

 

Are we not all foster children?

But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God. John 1:12

I thought of this verse this morning. As we continue in this journey of foster care, I think about how some choose to take this journey, and some well…don’t. Mind you, not everyone should be foster parents. But I wonder how many could, but don’t for various reasons.

We think of a foster child as being a child who has been taken from their biological parents because of a tragic situation, whatever that may be.

But the verse above should remind us of something.

We are all foster children in a sense.

As children of God, we should realize we were not always so. We became children of God again after a separation from Him. The separation was not our fault directly. And yes it was a tragic event. The fall of man separated us from God, and being a loving God, the loving Father of us all, He gave us a way to reconnect with Him through the blood of Jesus Christ.

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. John 3:16

So in a sense, we were separated and taken in by the world, only to be re-connected with our true Father, through our Savior.

And now, just as we were saved, we are asked to save others.

Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” Mat 28:19-20

How we choose to follow what Jesus commanded may be different. By no means is foster care the only way to serve. But I wonder how many of us have had our hearts touched by God though an opportunity to help a child in our community and allowed this fallen world to draw us away?

Is Jesus knocking on your heart now? Is there an empty room in your house?

 

Honey please take that out of your pants

Phrases heard in our home over the last few weeks:

Honey please take that out of your pants.

Don’t eat that.

Please use your fork.

No thank you, I dont like food from the floor.

Do you want to watch mit mouse again?

I want milk.

I want to eat.

I want juice.

I want yogurt.

I want my dolly!

I want my blankie!

Not nice!

Use your nice hands.

Bubble bath! Bubble bath!

No crayons are only for your coloring book.

There is no hitting in this house.

Ow? There’s no ow in bubble bath!

You are a wet baby!

Can you hold this for daddy?

Daddy needs your help.

Where is that wet toe?

A b c d e f g h i j k mmmop q r s t u v w x y z (unintelligible)  yaaaaay!

Taste it!

I like it!

Baby do you have a poopy in your pants?

Learning from the source

We can learn a great deal from these foster kids.

Why are we failing our kids America?

This video is a couple of years old, but thank God ABC News did this special to draw attention to the over medication of foster kids.

I hope God gives us the strength and the wisdom to help our little one heal from the trauma of being pulled from her bio family, without the need for medications.

I hope He gives us the wisdom to know when drugs are necessary, and when they simply need us!

 

Are you doing what you wanted to do when you grew up?

Today I have been thinking about what people’s lives are compared to what they wanted it to be as children.

When we are kids, we are always asked that question.  What do you want to be when you grow up?  If you listen to children, you will usually hear things like cowboy, astronaut, doctor, sports athlete, or fireman.  Those are all wonderful career choices.  As children grow, however, those choices change.  Our likes and dislikes, as well as our aptitude in different skills dictate what we eventually do when we grow.  Even more than that, are the life circumstances during our early years that often decide what we eventually choose to do with our lives.

 

But the most important decision maker in my mind is God’s plan for our life, combined with our free will to choose or not choose that plan.

I started out wanting to be a professional baseball player.  I was an avid fan as a child.  I couldn’t wait to get home from school so I could grab my glove and ball and go outside to play.  I knew all of the stats for my favorite players.  Being a Yankee fan, I knew every player on the team, the lineup, pitching rotation, and pretty much everything else that mattered about the team.  I just knew that eventually, I would be a Yankee too.

But life changed.

As I grew older, I realized that my skill level just wasn’t there.  Sure I could keep up with my team members in the league I played in.  And I was generally better than the average neighborhood kid.  But once I got to high school, I realized that my dreams of playing in the big leagues was just that – a dream.

So my interests changed.  They changed several times.  Eventually I ended up in my current career.  It is a career I absolutely love.  I am one of those people that love what they do.  I enjoy working.  And I believe it was God’s plan that I end up doing what I do.  I believe that throughout my life, he was shaping me, molding me, and making me into the man I am today.

But what about those people in the world that have fallen?

What about my little one’s mom?  I cannot imagine that when she was young, she wanted to grow up and have her children turned over to the state.  I am sure that as an innocent child, she wanted for herself a wonderful life, a wonderful upbringing, a wonderful career.  I am also convinced that God also wanted that for her.  I am even more convinced that God’s love has not changed, and that He continues to want that for her.

So today I wonder if it is God’s plan all along for some to fall?  Did God want my little one to be taken from her mom all along? No I don’t believe so.  I believe God want us to bear children, then protect them and keep them safe, raising them to honor Him.  I think it is our free will and the human race’s fall from grace that causes us to do things that do not honor Him.  We live in a fallen world, a world that contain great good, and also great evil. Because of the grace of God, my wife and I went one way, and my little one’s bio family another.

As our little one grows into a woman, I pray that her dream about what she wants to do when she grows up, combined with her free will, and God’s plan for her life, results in a positive and enriching life that honors God always.

What did you want to do when you grew up?

What are you doing now?

God will prevail in the face of adversity

We received a call this morning, one we were not happy about.  While I cannot reveal the detail, suffice it to say that God is throwing us a curve ball in our foster care journey.

Is it a test?  Is God trying to strengthen us for this challenge?

I don’t know.

What I do know is that our resolve has not been shaken.  Our little one has us in her corner, and the love of Jesus flowing through us to her has no end.

So I am confident He will prevail.

Today, we will lean on scripture

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.  Romans 8:28

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. James 1:2-4

Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed. Peter 4:12-13

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? Romans 8:31

 

Mommy and Daddy…

 

So as foster parents there is the inevitable dilemma.

What should our foster child call us?

Mommy and Daddy?

Should they call us by our names?

Is it even up to us?

 

Our little one has called us mommy and daddy since she got here.  Honestly we have not discouraged her, as doing so I think would cause even more confusion.  She is not old enough to understand why we would be discouraging her.  But I have to tell you at first it seemed odd.  Obviously not odd to this little innocent child.  Odd to the adults who know the circumstances.  I mean, how will the bio mom feel about that?  How will our little one react when she sees her bio mom again?

Just last night at dinner, we were sitting around at the table, and our little one pointed at me, and told my wife “That’s daddy!”.  I pointed at my wife and asked “Who’s that?” to which she answered “Mommy!”

After some thought, I realized the sense of comfort and safety those words must mean for her.  She is with mommy and daddy.  Mommy and daddy represent family to her.  They represent normalcy.  They represent love.  Isn’t that, in the end, what we are called to do for this little girl?  Aren’t we charged with bringing the joy and love of Christ to one who needs it the most?

Of course the answer is yes.  So for now, we will be her mommy and daddy.  One day, when she is older, she will understand the difference between our kind of mommy and daddy, and the bio mommy and daddy.  But this child has already experienced a trauma in her life  no child should ever experience.  Adding more trauma by trying to take away the only mommy and daddy she knows right now would not be in her best interests.

Besides, I can’t tell you it doesn’t feel good to be called daddy.  Sure, I know one day, she will be mad at me, and as most do, she will angrily take that title away from me as revenge.  It is part of growing up and for foster kids part of dealing with their circumstances.  And I will have to understand.

But right now, I am daddy.

And as George Strait says in his song, a dad’s love is “A love without end, Amen!”